Living in the Excuse-Free Zone
By Tommy Newberry, Author of The 4:8 Principle and Succes is Not an AccIdent

I believe the old slogan of the Paralympics says it all in the form of a question: What's Your Excuse? Often, questions are the best teachers because they prompt us to really think through an issue. When we're simply told something directly, we're more likely to smile politely and then let our thoughts drift to another subject. Questions can be captivating because we're conditioned to at least mentally answer the question. So ask yourself: "What is my excuse? What have I been telling myself that is hold- ing me back?"

I remember the first time I heard the classic homework excuse, "My dog ate my homework" from a third-grade classmate who didn't even have a dog. The entire class, including the teacher, broke out in laughter. I don't remember whether the excuse was "effective," but I do remember the laughter and the combination embarrassed/proud expression on the face of my classmate. Looking back, I realize how appropriate and natural the laughter was. Excuses should be laughed at, not dignified as they frequently are today. Excuses and responsibility cannot coexist. If you have one, you cannot have the other. It's very easy to say, "I'm not responsible," and so hard to say, "I am responsible." If there is anything in your life that is not the way you want it to be, you and only you are responsible for changing it.

As a responsible person, you believe that it is up to you to locate or create the solutions to the challenges of life. Whether it is something big or small, you're still responsible, and each time you give an excuse you diminish your respect, your credibility, and your integrity in your own eyes as well as the eyes of others. Each time you make an excuse, you reinforce your propensity to make even more excuses in the future, and excuse making becomes a habit. The irresponsible person believes finding the solutions to the problems of life is someone else's department.

Commit to making your home, car and office an excuse-free zone. If a situation arises that previously called for an excuse, substitute the words, "I am responsible," where the excuse used to go. Look only to yourself for the cause of your problems or lack. If there is an aspect of your life that you are not in love with, accept that you are responsible for it. Either you passively allowed it to happen or you actively created it. This is not an invi- tation to beat up on yourself but an encouragement to see the truth of how and why you got to where you are. Remember, somebody, somewhere has usually had it far worse than you and still succeeded. And you can succeed as well the moment you want a goal more than you want an excuse. Only when you acknowledge this truth can you be freed to build a future that is far more attractive than the past.